Genesis 24 - Love, Marriage, Family...

In our sixth week in Genesis 24 we have considered God's design for marriage, the family, and how to love. We have been reminded that marriage is not a creation of culture. It is a divine design by God to accomplish the purpose of putting His glory on display by creating man and woman in His image, commanding them to be fruitful and multiply, thereby filling the earth with his glory. Psalm 127 reminds us that "Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain." This begs us to ask the question, "Are we letting the Lord build our houses and homes? Are we submitting to His design as the Master Builder?" If not, then we are apparently building in vain. In Genesis 24 we see God fulfilling the promise to make Abraham's name great. One of the means He is using is this arranged marriage between Isaac and Rebekah. God has brought them together and is continuing to build their house, SO THAT they may point others to God and proclaim HIS GREATNESS.
So what happens if we don't submit to Gods design and allow him to build our homes? Exodus 34 says that in turning from God, we, a covenant people, may in fact make a covenant with the culture. And as we covenant with the culture they will invite us to come and "WHORE" after their gods with them. And as we do, we will marry our sons and daughters off to their sons and daughters and they will follow suit, whoring after the gods of the spouses that they have been unequally yoked to. The strong language in this passage reminds us of the sobering and terrifying reality of what happens when we shelve God's design and make a covenant with the culture. We are supposed to be a reflection of God to the culture, not of the culture back to God.
Seeing these two very different pictures, it is easy to conclude that it is of HUGE IMPORTANCE that we care about our marriages and families flourishing. So we must ask, how do we flourish? What is God's design that we might submit to so that our homes are being built by Him in faith, rather than us in vanity? What kind of love is it that builds a home faithfully?
Ephesians 5 commands husbands to "love their wives as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her". Has the church, the bride of Christ, ever merited the love of Christ? Is there anything that we could do to earn it? Or is Christ's will to love us greater than our lovability? And Titus 2 explains that in a church, where there is a right order of things, that "older women are to train younger women to love their husband and children". Have you ever considered that within the community of faith, you could be trained... by another sinner... to love your husband and children? Husbands, are you eager to have your wife connect with an older woman so that she might be trained to love you and the kids? TRAINING is a picture of something you do when you want to be pushed beyond your natural ability. Good training usually involves a good amount of sacrifice and pain and being broken down so that you may come back stronger. To keep at it, there must be a will to do so, because your emotions will tell you it is just too much.
Ravi Zacharias, author of "I Isaac take thee Rebekah" states, "Love is as much a question of the will as it is the emotion. And if you will to love somebody, you can." That may be one of the most UNCULTURAL quotes that I have ever shared. It is not cultural to will to love someone. Culture says that if it takes work to love, then it probably isn't love. Culture says that it is supposed to be easy because the two in the relationship are "just soooo lovable". I would add that there obviously has to be a balance of the emotion and the will. But I would also offer that your emotion and passion will be limited by your will to love. If your will to love is great, passion will likely be great. A will to love will rightly inform passion and the emotions.
In both Ephesians 5 and Titus 2 we see an intersection between marriage and church. Marriage, Church, and Family are not separate spheres of life. They have everything to do with each other. Our standard for love within marriage is the example Christ set in loving the church. It is within the church, the community of believing covenant people, that our love is tested and tried and informed and trained.
This week, we will continue to look at this relationship between marriage, family and the church, and we will consider that as the church has become less about the family and more about the individual, marriage has followed suit. One indicator that we will consider is how similar the language is between the unhappy individualistic spouse, and the unhappy individualistic church member... "You are not making me happy, so I am going to go and look elsewhere..." This selfish, individualistic approach to marriage and to church is so damaging. If we submit to God's design, the will to love will keep us from parting ways over a difference of opinion, while holding high the value of TRUTH as it is revealed by God.